I have decided its time to find a new Best Friend! Not that I won't keep my other ones of course, but there is a definite lack of flavor in my life at the moment and a new Bestie is just the way to fix it! Please fill out this short questionnaire for consideration. Thank you.
1. Are you male or female?
2. Do you now, or have you ever obsessed over Lady Gaga?
3. Are you homosexual? If you answer no to this one: Are you willing to be?
4. Are you able to provide fashion advice?
5. Would you truthfully tell me if my ass looked big? or if I had something stuck in my teeth?
6. Are you willing to wear an inscribed BFF bracelet or necklace at all times?
7. Are you willing to accept phone calls and text messages 24/7 for when I am feeling lonely or needy or I if I have a bad dream?
8. Will you accompany me to the restroom regardless of where we are?
9. Are you available for long shopping trips that will (unfortunately) include at least one, but prolly both punky punks who hate shopping?
10. If you had one ticket to see Lady Ga would you willingly gift it to me because I obviously love her more than you?
11. If I have an identity crisis and forget, for example, that I am not 18 anymore are you willing to let me down easy?
12. Finally, and prolly the most important, should I lose my mind and decide to get Vagazzled will you happily punch me in the face?
If there is anything super important that you think I may have left off of my BFF application please feel free to let me know. I wanna make sure I get this right Webbers. Its important!