Thursday, October 22, 2009

Look out; B-Day Coming Through

The reality that Charley is back in the Army is starting to sink in. DOH! I was kinda hoping that it would hold off until the first deployment orders came in. Cause I know they are coming, I feel it in the air.

Or maybe, it’s the chill of fall in the air. Or perhaps the knowledge that I am about to be a year older. Like that I don’t actually age all year. It suddenly, magically, mysteriously happens one day of every year. That day happens to be Mischief Night. You know, the day before Halloween?

Every other day during the year I can somehow maintain my youth- never growing older, never gaining weight, or circles under my eyes, or crow’s feet. Never. I don’t age. Then every year on October 29th I go to bed and when I awake something happens. Suddenly an entire years worth of ageing has been shoved into one night.

I have bags under my eyes, I have fine lines and wrinkles, I gained 19 lbs, my skinny pants disappeared from my closet. Oh, wait, I never actually owned any skinny pants- my butt is WAY too big to be seen in those! Whoooooo! Scary just to think about. “Like two pigs wrestling under a blanket!” Name that movie! Perhaps I should get some for my Halloween costume this year…

Anywho.  My day of aging is rapidly approaching. There is nothing I can do to hold it at bay. Except for perhaps buying $2,345.93 worth of Arbonne products from Momma Brown.  Arbonne is gonna take over the world, just so you know. And you know what- I can even get a friends and family discount so that my $2,345.93 will cover the face wash, eye liner (in black pencil- I still haven’t mastered the liquid); AND the thermal heat mask face scrubbing stuff! Sweet! She might even throw in a few free samples of good smelling lotions just to sweeten the deal.

Well, once again this year Charley is off the hook as far as b-day presents. I tell you what. Guys in the Army have it pretty sweet. “Babe, I couldn’t get you an anniversary present this year. We were hit by an IED on the way to *(insert name of some small Iraq village here)*. Happens every other year.

 And what can you say to that? “Yes Dear, I understand you were taking heavy fire but if you really loved me you would have made sure you sent the Hadji version of all 502 Disney Movies for my birthday this year!” Yeah, Army guys have it pretty sweet.

So once again I am going to pretend that my day isn’t coming. I have made another Mom Law. If my hubby isn’t here then I don’t age. No Charley, no birthday. This way he doesn’t have to put himself out there to try and buy me some super sweet present and I don’t have to get any older! At least every other year that is…

Tuesday, October 20, 2009

Pygmy Marmoset

My littlest punk asked me today if she can have a Pygmy Marmoset. I replied, “What the heck is a Pygmy Marmoset?” because really, coming from a three year old the words Pygmy Marmoset do not actually sound like they should. Its hard enough to decipher words like peanut butter and library. Pygmy Marmoset is taking things to the extreme. And where the heck did she even learn about Pygmy Marmosets?

I will tell you where…. Diego.  As in Go, Diego, Go. As in a cartoon. My kid learned more from a dang cartoon than from all the books I have been reading to her. None of them contain any information about a Pygmy Marmoset. No wonder I am clueless. I will not be topped by a cartoon!!! So hang on while I tell you exactly what a Pygmy Marmoset is…

This is a baby Pygmy Marmoset. I just want to snuggle him!

The Pygmy Marmoset is the world's smallest monkey, head and body length varies from 117-152 mm and its tail length varies from 172-229 mm, or about 13 inches on average. The adult weight is only 85-140 grams or approximately four ounces on average!
The Pygmy Marmoset is one of the cutest primates on this planet, they are no bigger than a soda can.  The Pygmy Marmoset usually has a tawny coat, and a ringed tail that is as long as its body.

Pygmy Marmosets usually have a lifespan of about 6-9 years in captitivity, although a lifespan of 15 years has been recored before. Not much is known about native lifespan of Pygmy Marmosets.

Oh. My. Aching. It Hurts. Must have...
And I will confess something to you. I am getting really good at disclosure on this site. Because my hubby is in the Army we spend lots of time apart. He goes to “the field” for weeks on end or deploys or sent to different schools- whatever the reason, he is gone a lot. And every time he is gone I start thinking that I need another animal. Or a baby. But mostly another animal.
At one point I had three dogs, fish, and three lizards. And I was pregnant. Yeah, he was gone for a year. It did me in, I couldn’t help myself.
Well, I haven’t seen him since May. Its been a long time since May. I have started thinking again. Thinking it might be time for another animal. Not another baby. Animal.

And my youngest punk has given me an idea. I need a baby Pygmy Marmoset. I need one. My arms ache to hold it, and squeeze it, and call him George.
Now I just need to break the news to Charley…

Monday, October 19, 2009


I have a secret to tell. But if I tell you then you can't tell anyone. Like ever. Or at least till I am finished with the project. At that point you are expected to tell everyone you know, twice.

Are you ready?


Come on already......

Okay, here is the deal. I am going to write a children's book. A book that will hopefully inspire younger and older kids alike.

More specifically, a three year old punk and a nine year old punk. But I might need to change that to a four year old punk and a ten year old punk cause I really don't know how long it is going to take me.

Curious? Well, I can tell you it will have a character named Helen Hopper, the Green Eyed Tree Frog. And this guy:

And the super great part of it all is that John is going to do the photography. He is great. He photographed our trip to the Brookfield Zoo back in May. Check out his other stuff here.

As for the rest of the project... Well, I might keep a tight lid on it until I get farther on.... Lots of changes are in the future and I don't want to make any promises I can't keep. Or get your hopes up and then not deliver.

 But this bird friend? He is in like Flyn.

Sunday, October 18, 2009


And here we go dear Reader. I am linking Enjoy the Ride with my new blackberry. We will be connected like never before! That is, of course, if I can get the silly thing to work. Like Regis and Kelly I am a Tech-NO! As in technology and disagree on who is in charge around here. Just give me Time- I will get this pesky phone to do what its told!
Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry