I promised yesterday that I would share a guest post from the TrueFather, aka Captain Normal, aka My Dad, and here it is. I asked him to explain how he became the Superhero known as Captain Normal and this is his candid response. Enjoy the Ride!
As with most Superhero’s, life altering event(s) occurred which changed my ordinary life of husband, father, and young American laborer to Superhero status. The events happened so long ago that the formation of rocks has surely occurred in the interim. It happened somewhere after Gabe the Babe (my older bro) and before B-Dub. For those needing further reference, we’re talking about that historical time period known as “sometime before 1980”.
The event of the transformation happened, not at once as with the Hulk, but gradually over time. A forging if you will; the shaping under the hammer of events and tempered by the sands of time.
Driving along a country road in Cooke County, Texas – the sun was but a few hours from making its way into the morning sky. Time for me at this point held little meaning other than an indicator of where to be and what to do. My current employment was working second shift at a local factory manufacturing airline seats. My shift began at 4:30 pm and ran to 12:00 am, with a standard two hours mandatory over-time almost every night. The job, in and of itself, was not that demanding. The usual stuff – supervising a production line, dealing with the boss, trying to stay on-top of an ever changing production schedule, and all the while running over school assignments in the back of my mind.
School – who would have thunk – this country boy was actually in college. Having a wife and two kids it was important for me to load up the schedule and complete my degree program as quickly as possible. So my first lab or class began each morning at 7:30 am and I went through the day until 3:30. Afterwards I would then head to the factory for work. School, work, family, house, church, with an occasional broken down vehicle – days blurred into days, weeks into weeks, semesters into semesters.
The drive home that night was peaceful enough, yet on this winding back country road it was best never to let your mind wander too far from the present. As I rounded a sharp bend in the road that lead to a steep decent down a small hill and then quickly up the other side to wind further through the Scrub Oak and Walnut of the Texas Cross Timbers region, I noticed a set of eyes in the middle of the road. I slowed my ’56 Ford pick-up truck should the critter scramble into my path. At that moment the World seemed to freeze and proceed as a movie in slow motion – one frame at a time. As I drew near the creature its eyes locked onto mine, attempting to communicate without speech. Then when passing I experienced the sensation of being ripped out of the moment and thrown back into the present - pressed down by G-force as my pick-up transitioned from down to up.
My reaction time was hampered and I was unable to stop the truck for several seconds. By then I had reached the top of the hill. All was still and no-other cars were in sight. I turned my truck around and drove back to the spot where I had seen this creature. Sure enough – there it was in the middle of the road – dead as a hammer. I did not remember running the thing over, so did not have any feelings of guilt or anxiety along those lines; however, felt saddened by the sight none-the-less. For some reason I was compelled to get out of my truck and move the poor animal to the side of the road. My initial thoughts were for future drivers who would be passing this way. But as I neared the creature – a rather large raccoon – its spirit rose up and began to speak to me. I was somewhat startled by the event. I knew that it was the raccoon’s spirit and not the spirit of the dead toad that was nearby. Any boy who has spent time on the Brazos River can tell the difference between a raccoon and a toad spirit.
The encounter was brief, but the instructions I received were very clear. I was to carry the broken body of the raccoon to my home and there perform the ceremony which would transform its lifeless body and release its spirit to run among the stars. The date – October 30, 1979; a coincidence B-Dub - I don’t think so (note: this date is exactly one year prior to the birth of B-Dub which occurred on October 30, 1980 and as such I can claim no responsibility for his craziness).
Several of my co-workers and I had agreed to come to work in our Halloween costumes. I’d had to squeeze the creation of this costume into my schedule over the weeks preceding the event. Fashioning rocket-packs out of large white plastic glue tubes we used at work – complete with air vent tubes and colored lights. But what really set it apart from the rest was my new ‘coon skin cap.
As I was walking across the factory parking lot one fella yelled out – “hey, you look pretty weird!” This drew a comment from another – “looks pretty Normal for him.” And then I caught a question from a third – “What are you; some kind of space Captain?” The rest is history….
Captain Normal with sidekick Monkey Boy, 2009
Who would have thought that such a seemingly normal day would result in the birth of a Superhero that shaped the very fibers of my existence. Needless to say we (the sibs and I) always had the best Halloween costumes EVER.
What are your thoughts on Captain Normal? Interested in hearing more? Perhaps we should play a game called "Ask Captain Normal" in which he answers your questions about Life, the Universe, and Everything. I for one would like to know where he stands on the "Knock Knock" versus "Your Momma" joke debate. Or how he feels about the co-ed shower theory as argued by Charley. This is serious business Webbies, serious. Thoughts?