You should see the looks I get when she spouts that one out in public. Geesh.
Sunday, December 5, 2010
Tooth Fairy-ish Nonsense
Littlest is scared to come out of her room. She counts her teeth before bed and in the mornings just to make sure. Wanna know why? Cause the mean Tooth Fairy on the top of our tree might try and steal them if she isn't careful. Thats right, the TOOTH FAIRY. On top of our tree, and the tree at her school, and the tree at McCrappies, and the tree at Wally.... you get the idea. Tooth Fairy.
You should see the looks I get when she spouts that one out in public. Geesh.
You should see the looks I get when she spouts that one out in public. Geesh.
Wednesday, December 1, 2010
The Tale of Two Trees
We met in March, married in April, and moved to Montana in May. Whirlwind romance doesn't begin to describe it. It was crazy, stupid, and wrong (in more ways than one). So when I say it was our first Christmas what I mean is: I didn't know anything about being "together" during a holiday, nothing about family traditions, nothing about not going home. Nothing.
And then we had our first big fight. And by "big fight" I mean all encompassing - you're not gonna change me- NO, I'm not just like your Grandma- kinda fight. Basically two bulls met in the china shop and neither bull won. And ya wanna know why? I will tell you why, and he might go all guy-ish and say he doesn't remember or that it wasn't such a big deal but I REMEMBER, cause it was our first fight. And my life was almost over cause of it.
It was all due to the fact that I wanted a fake tree. Not just any fake tree either; I'm talking super fake with ONLY blue and white ornaments. And snowmen. If it wasn't blue, white, or snowman shaped it wasn't going anywhere NEAR my tree. Cause it was our first one and I wanted it to be special, something to be remembered, something to be proud of. His idea of "special" and "proud" were different than mine.
He wanted his ornaments his Momma just gave him on my blue, white, and snowman tree. But he didn't tell me that. He didn't even tell me that his Momma GAVE him the ornaments. I didn't know. I also didn't know that fake tree and 'Montana' don't mix. Its like adding pine-sol and bleach. Or is it Lysol? Anywho- you should never mix cleaning supplies or go on a huffing spree even if it is Christmas.
Back at it: The fight was on, only see it wasn't fair cause I thought we were fighting cause he kept picking on me saying stuff like "I can't believe I married my GRANDMOTHER" and then talk smack about how Grammy can't cook and how she has a tree that only has blue and white and snowman ornaments. He was mean and hurt my widdle feewings. All the while I kept hurting his just by not recognizing his need for... for..... well, for lack of better wording- tradition.
Tradition doesn't feel like the right word, its something more- like Alice I didn't have my "muchness" and I didn't even realize it. So long story short it wasn't exactly the bestest first Christmas ever. Unfortunately neither was our second- which was really our third cause he was deployed for the 'real' second one. It was back to the whole "tree" thing again. I just didn't get it; it wasn't about the ornaments.
Fast forward a whole lotta years: The kids and I decorated our tree tonight. We went through every box of ornaments and told stories about some while others were shoved on as fast as possible so they could each hang more than their sibling. Finally the end came and I tucked them into their beds and sat on the couch looking at that dang tree. The kids each put some of Daddy's ornaments on. I saved a few to put on myself. The kids had put all of his right at eye level (so basically the top and bottom of the tree are totally covered with not much in the middle) so I spread them all out and added the ribbons and bows that tiny hands couldn't quite master.
I think I get it now. The ones we love the most are the ones that have been around the longest. I don't care anymore if my tree is bluewhitesnowman. My tree has all colors, shapes, sizes (I like to think its an equal opportunity tree). What makes it great is the stories we share about each one, the memory, the love. Its not about the commercialization- the best ones are made by generations of tiny hands. And for us its one more way to try and fill in the hole he left behind. For me, its one more physical representation of how that man has made me a better person without even trying.
ps: Most awesome tree skirt EVER, handmade by the bestest sister ever. Even if her name is Bert.
pps: I think the angel is about to take a flying leap. Prolly I should cut down the branch that is shoved so rudely up her derrière so she is a little more stable.
And then we had our first big fight. And by "big fight" I mean all encompassing - you're not gonna change me- NO, I'm not just like your Grandma- kinda fight. Basically two bulls met in the china shop and neither bull won. And ya wanna know why? I will tell you why, and he might go all guy-ish and say he doesn't remember or that it wasn't such a big deal but I REMEMBER, cause it was our first fight. And my life was almost over cause of it.
It was all due to the fact that I wanted a fake tree. Not just any fake tree either; I'm talking super fake with ONLY blue and white ornaments. And snowmen. If it wasn't blue, white, or snowman shaped it wasn't going anywhere NEAR my tree. Cause it was our first one and I wanted it to be special, something to be remembered, something to be proud of. His idea of "special" and "proud" were different than mine.
He wanted his ornaments his Momma just gave him on my blue, white, and snowman tree. But he didn't tell me that. He didn't even tell me that his Momma GAVE him the ornaments. I didn't know. I also didn't know that fake tree and 'Montana' don't mix. Its like adding pine-sol and bleach. Or is it Lysol? Anywho- you should never mix cleaning supplies or go on a huffing spree even if it is Christmas.
Back at it: The fight was on, only see it wasn't fair cause I thought we were fighting cause he kept picking on me saying stuff like "I can't believe I married my GRANDMOTHER" and then talk smack about how Grammy can't cook and how she has a tree that only has blue and white and snowman ornaments. He was mean and hurt my widdle feewings. All the while I kept hurting his just by not recognizing his need for... for..... well, for lack of better wording- tradition.
Tradition doesn't feel like the right word, its something more- like Alice I didn't have my "muchness" and I didn't even realize it. So long story short it wasn't exactly the bestest first Christmas ever. Unfortunately neither was our second- which was really our third cause he was deployed for the 'real' second one. It was back to the whole "tree" thing again. I just didn't get it; it wasn't about the ornaments.
Fast forward a whole lotta years: The kids and I decorated our tree tonight. We went through every box of ornaments and told stories about some while others were shoved on as fast as possible so they could each hang more than their sibling. Finally the end came and I tucked them into their beds and sat on the couch looking at that dang tree. The kids each put some of Daddy's ornaments on. I saved a few to put on myself. The kids had put all of his right at eye level (so basically the top and bottom of the tree are totally covered with not much in the middle) so I spread them all out and added the ribbons and bows that tiny hands couldn't quite master.
I think I get it now. The ones we love the most are the ones that have been around the longest. I don't care anymore if my tree is bluewhitesnowman. My tree has all colors, shapes, sizes (I like to think its an equal opportunity tree). What makes it great is the stories we share about each one, the memory, the love. Its not about the commercialization- the best ones are made by generations of tiny hands. And for us its one more way to try and fill in the hole he left behind. For me, its one more physical representation of how that man has made me a better person without even trying.
And it occurred to me that all you can see
in this pic are the blue and white ornaments,
but I totally swear there are TONs of others.
Stupid flash.
ps: Most awesome tree skirt EVER, handmade by the bestest sister ever. Even if her name is Bert.
pps: I think the angel is about to take a flying leap. Prolly I should cut down the branch that is shoved so rudely up her derrière so she is a little more stable.
Tuesday, November 30, 2010
Wags: I Love you
I recently tuned into the world of couponing. Never bothered before and oh how very wrong I was. With a little bit of blog reading *which I do anyways* and the purchase of a Sunday paper I too can be a super saver. Example: Todays Walgreens trip
Total for all items: $110.23
Total Walgreens store coupons: $31.75
Total Manufacturer coupons: $ 36.69
Total Register Rewards (cash back to use on next purchase): 25.00
Total Savings: $ 93.44
Making todays grand total a whopping 16.79
Wanna know what 16.79 look like? Whoot, here it is:
Total for all items: $110.23
Total Walgreens store coupons: $31.75
Total Manufacturer coupons: $ 36.69
Total Register Rewards (cash back to use on next purchase): 25.00
Total Savings: $ 93.44
Making todays grand total a whopping 16.79
Wanna know what 16.79 look like? Whoot, here it is:
Pretty much an awful pic thanks to the dark and rainy crap outside.
Not to mention the blur- why bbry are you blurry? Jerk.
And since my phone is pulling its blurry crap I will just tell you what I got:
4 packages command hooks (the ones that wont mess up the walls) 1 Bic candle lighter, 2 sticker books, 2 mini puzzles, 1 box 100 ct envelopes, 1 box 40 ct envelopes, 2 juicy fruit collectors tins (full of gum), 3 pkgs Breathe Right strips, 3 bags Betty Crocker blueberry muffins, 2 boxes Domino brown sugar, 4 large bags pretzel M&Ms, 2 large bags mint M&Ms, 2 large bags peanut M&Ms, 2 bottles Dawn dish soap, 2 Skittles filled Santa heads, 2 bottles NyQuil, 2 containers of Lysol wipes, 1 box puffs tissues, 6 small packages Russel Stovers chocolate Santas, and one package of pain patches.
Super Duper Fun : ) Tomorrow is Target day- hopefully it will go as well!!!!
Wednesday, November 10, 2010
Wednesday, November 3, 2010
H is for Happy with Him, oh and Halloween
Goofs, I know.
Oldest had to sneak in for this one.
Charley looks like he has a little Captain in him
Littlest pulling her "Anna Nicole" impersonation.
What should have been under the shroud- but it was itchy and had to go
BTW he was supposed to be one of the ring wraiths from
Lord of the Rings. Except he didn't like the hood all the way on
cause then he couldn't see...
Wednesday, October 20, 2010
Hoarder Success Story or Fiery Bunghole. Toss up.
Yesterday in my nervous energy state (yep, C is traveling only I don't know when he will actually get HERE) I took it upon myself to clean Littlest room. I should totally be on Hoarders cause after two very full trash bags of toys made their final migration to the trash bin outside her toy box was still overflowing. OVERFLOWING. Geesh, no wonder her dang room was always a mess! Best part is she hasn't even noticed that anything is missing. Serious. Kinda makes me not want to buy her anything for Christmas except for underwear. And maybe socks.
It was during this cleaning spree that something super wrong started happening to me. And by "super wrong" I mean I have flames of fire shooting out of my a*%. FIRE. It was so nasty I had to shower after. Twice. Awesome.
And now you know more about me than you did yesterday.
And I still don't know when Charley is gonna get off his ever lovin tuckas and freakin pick up the phone and tell me when he will be here!!!!
Patience and I are not friends.
Oh, and I'm wearing purple today- so should you
It was during this cleaning spree that something super wrong started happening to me. And by "super wrong" I mean I have flames of fire shooting out of my a*%. FIRE. It was so nasty I had to shower after. Twice. Awesome.
And now you know more about me than you did yesterday.
And I still don't know when Charley is gonna get off his ever lovin tuckas and freakin pick up the phone and tell me when he will be here!!!!
Patience and I are not friends.
Oh, and I'm wearing purple today- so should you
FREAKIN get here ALREADY!
Friday, October 15, 2010
My Car is Possessed and Other Unfortunate Events
Ya know how sometimes you park in front of a building that has rows of windows and you can see your car's reflection? Well, either my car is possessed or the buildings I park in front of are haunted. Seeing as I park in front of lots of buildings I'm inclined to believe that its my car. I try to be good to her, sure the exploding soda cans were an oversight on my part, but maintenance is almost always only a few months late. Now she is expressing her dislike of my ownership or some mean spirited ghost has possessed her. I think its the ghost cause who wouldn't want to be my car???
Anywho, besides the exploding radiator and ruptured brake lines we now have the "magic lights." And by magic lights I mean sometimes when I see her reflection the headlights both work and sometimes only one works. And it isn't always the same one thats not working. I'm thinking this poltergeist has personality, likes variety and long walks on the beach. I'm giving her free reign until Charley get here (he gets on the helicopter tomorrow-ish!!!!!) At that point he is gonna kick her sorry butt out of there and my poor baby car can return to normal.
In other news Oldest thought he saw a mouse in the basement. And then I thought I saw mouse poop in the basement. I bought those sticky traps, lots of them, and strategically placed them around the perimeter just like it says to. Do you think I caught the mouse? Nope, that would be too normal for my house. Instead I'm catching birds. Birds with yellow feathers. Birds that have no hope of becoming unstuck from the sticky. Poor birds.
And then there is Littlest. She had to get some shots and shots equal ear splitting screeching, crying, and gnashing of teeth followed by crabby butt. Speaking of butts, yesterday she came out of the bathroom and announced "My butt hates me" and ran to her room. Gotta love my punks : )
Anywho, besides the exploding radiator and ruptured brake lines we now have the "magic lights." And by magic lights I mean sometimes when I see her reflection the headlights both work and sometimes only one works. And it isn't always the same one thats not working. I'm thinking this poltergeist has personality, likes variety and long walks on the beach. I'm giving her free reign until Charley get here (he gets on the helicopter tomorrow-ish!!!!!) At that point he is gonna kick her sorry butt out of there and my poor baby car can return to normal.
In other news Oldest thought he saw a mouse in the basement. And then I thought I saw mouse poop in the basement. I bought those sticky traps, lots of them, and strategically placed them around the perimeter just like it says to. Do you think I caught the mouse? Nope, that would be too normal for my house. Instead I'm catching birds. Birds with yellow feathers. Birds that have no hope of becoming unstuck from the sticky. Poor birds.
And then there is Littlest. She had to get some shots and shots equal ear splitting screeching, crying, and gnashing of teeth followed by crabby butt. Speaking of butts, yesterday she came out of the bathroom and announced "My butt hates me" and ran to her room. Gotta love my punks : )
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