The Truth Hurts

So now that I'm officially recognizing the fact that Charley will be gone in about a month, it's time to share what I know.

1. We have entered the awkward "Leaving Soon" stage- we want to spend every minute we can together while at the same time growing resentful of the fact that we both have lives to live outside of each other. Not to mention that there is such as thing as spending too much time together...

2. Charley has admitted that he is nervous about deploying with a new unit- a unit that he hasn't trained with at all, doing a job that he has never done before. This in turn makes me more nervous. Not to mention that he is going to a "hot spot." The area in Afghanistan that right by the border with Pakistan. Ya know, the area where they are having all sorts of issues right now.

3. The kids are now "in the know" which makes things harder as we deal with their questions and concerns. Kids are a bit too honest for comfort and are willing to speak the words that scare me.

4. Charley has spent the last 7 months away from us. We reunited on New Years Day, and already he has to go. The plus side is that I am already used to raising the two punks alone. The down side? They are growing up with out their Dadda.

5. Deployments are hard on EVERYONE. And as such I feel like I have no room to complain. But really, 16 months is a very long time without your hubby.

6. We have officially decided not to have any more kids. Hard for my overactive hormones to accept. Harder still is the thought that if we did have another Charley probably wouldn't be there for the delivery. I had our oldest punk long before we met, and our littlest punk while he was in Iraq the last time. He will never get to see one of his children enter the world- and it makes me feel like he missed out on the most wonderful experience of a lifetime.

7. I'm secretly glad that we aren't going to have any more kids. Kinda contradicts what I said in #6, I know. But my last pregnancy ended with a month of hospital bed rest, preeclampsia, and three long months to get my blood sugars and blood pressure back under control. Not to mention  the year it took to lose those extra 100 lbs I tend to gain while pregnant. I'm not exaggerating. With my oldest I gained 110 lbs, and with littlest it was just under 100. Go figure my body went haywire.

8. I am going to try really really really really really hard to stay positive at all times. Especially on the blog, even though Charley doesn't ever read it unless I ask him too. His family does sometimes, and thats enough reason to try and stay upbeat.

Seriously LOVE my hair red!!!!! And long, time to grow it out again!

And I love being skinny- this pic is pre-littlest punk. One day....one day...

So there we have it. Thanks for all the support Interwebby friends, and facebook friends, and even my twitter friends. You guys are going to be the reason I can pull this off. I know I'm not alone.